Pregnancy can be difficult by itself, but add complications and it can be enough to push anyone over the edge. My pregnancy journey was fraught with emotional highs and lows as I combated depression and Preeclampsia. It is during those times that it is time to cry out to God with a prayer for pregnancy complications.
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The Difficulties of a Complicated Pregnancy
I once described my postpartum depression as a forest; a place you can walk to and easily get lost in. I’ve liken anxiety and my preeclampsia diagnosis as storms; rough winds with nothing to hold onto. This is a short story of how fixing on Jesus helped me walk out of my postpartum forest and calmed the storms in me.
It was January of 2012 that first rocked my boat. I was pregnant with my baby girl and loving how she grew inside of me. At our 26 weeks appointment, the OB/GYN sat me down and I remember how the air in the room shifted. She told me that all the birth plans I had eagerly shared with her in the beginning would have to change. Instead, our plan was to try to get me to deliver a healthy baby girl.
Getting a diagnosis makes you feel small – at least, in my personal experience. Here I was, a college educated professional and I was handed a preeclampsia diagnosis that I knew nothing about. So I did what most people do. I googled.
I researched all I could about Preeclampsia which is a serious and potentially deadly disorder that affects both mom and baby.
I cried the more I read about preterm delivery complications, maternal and infant mortality numbers – according to the Preeclampsia Foundation (preeclampsia.org) it is the leading cause of infant and maternal death, globally – and what it could mean for my husband, my little girl, and me.
We were ready to embrace a baby, but would we be ready to take on the challenges of having a premature baby? One who could potentially have serious medical and developmental issues?
A Prayer for Pregnancy Complications when we get Discouraging News
Abba Father, I just received some tragic news about my pregnancy. I’m not sure I am ready to accept what my doctor told me. I am asking you today for comfort, grace, and peace. Please surround my baby with your healing protection. Give me wisdom to know how to proceed, and give me peace during this difficult time.
If you are interested in more resources for when pregnancy becomes complicated and discouraging, I encourage you to check out “Redeeming Childbirth.” This is a powerful book that has helped many struggling moms.
Grace Through Pain and Discomfort
As Christians, we thought of those questions but knew in our hearts that we were already in love and God will provide and help us with whatever comes our way.
I don’t quite remember what happened between 26 weeks and the day I walked into my 31 week appointment. I can tell you that I packed a hospital bag. Something told me that I wasn’t going home that day.
And I was right. I walked into the OB/GYN clinic, and walked out. I then drove the few yards to the hospital next door where they were waiting to admit me.
I had just gotten reconciled with the idea of making the hospital room as my home for the next few weeks when they started to notice my baby girl in distress.
I would later find out that my placenta had partially abrupted (separating from the uterine wall) and since I was hooked up to a monitor, they were able to save me and my baby girl. I’ve never believed in luck or coincidences. It wasn’t a coincidence that I had packed my bags. It wasn’t luck that I was already on hospital bed rest and hooked up to machines that detect not only my blood pressure, but my infant’s heart. These were written into my story that God designed.
I had my baby girl at 31 weeks. She weighed 3 pounds, 3 ounces. I couldn’t touch her as they wheeled her out to me. I saw wires and tubes before I saw her face. And then she was wheeled out and was life-flighted out to a hospital with a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), as our local hospital didn’t have one.
I was alone in my hospital room willing myself to recover as quickly as possible while my only child was 2 hours away.
I can’t even begin to tell you how many prayers were uttered and how much tears were shed those two days I was there.
I can tell you that for the next 43 days, my family would drive me daily to the hospital to be with my Ellie.
I can tell you that I grew to be grateful for the next four years of her life. Each day, every moment, I would breathe in my child and just be in awe of how far she had come.
And then one day, my gratitude shifted. In its place were anger, fear, and bitterness.
A Prayer for Pregnancy Complications when Bitterness Sets in
Dear Lord, I am feeling frustrated, bitter, and angry. This is not how my pregnancy was supposed to go! Just like any other day, I need you, but right now I feel like I need you more than usual. Please come into this pregnancy and redeem what has been lost. I trust you Father.
Prayer for Healthy Pregnancy
I was pregnant with my second and hated it.
Even as each appointment, I was deemed healthy, I was fearful. Even as weeks went by without a sign of Preeclampsia, I grew anxious. I packed my bags as we reached 26 weeks. I remember having a panic attack when we reached 31 weeks. I started writing “dear Ellie” letters just “in case I or my baby didn’t make it.”
I stopped praying and instead bargained and yelled at God that this life I was carrying would ruin a perfectly amazing trio.
I kept waiting for Preeclampsia and when “it” showed up one day when I was 34 weeks, 4 days gestation, I pointed a finger at God and said I knew it. Here we go. Thanks, God. What am I going to do with one kid while I sit in the NICU with another? I was falling apart and stitching myself back up with rage which not only separated me from God, but also my son.
I can’t exactly pinpoint the day I finally looked like I was falling apart that it took another person to tell me I needed to seek help. In retrospect, I must have known something was brewing inside of me when my heart and head clicked into place. I hadn’t bonded with my son the same way I had bonded with my daughter. I didn’t hear him crying in the crib next to me. I wanted to run as far away from this beautiful life. It wasn’t until I reread the goodbye letters I wrote that I prayed for counsel and finally asked for help.
Prayer for a Healthy Pregnancy
Dear Lord, I’m confess that I am not perfect. I confess that this pregnancy scares me. I want to see my little one soon and enjoy the creation that you so beautifully crafted. Please provide my little one and me with a safe pregnancy. Give me grace for whatever lies ahead.
A Prayer for Pregnancy Complications
Somewhere in my postpartum forest, I found a path that lead me back to God. He had answered every cry for help, even when my voice was shaking.
By His Grace, I learned to extend that same courtesy to myself.
I am loved. I am enough. I am a good mother.
In my darkest storms, I was never alone.
Fast forward two years later and my now seven year old prays with me our daily thanks. My two year old keeps me on my toes and my arms and heart feel like they’ve doubled in size. There is more to love and hold. There is more to be grateful for. There is always Grace in our seasons – even in the darkest storms and forest.
Dear Lord, I need a prayer for pregnancy complications that you will hear. I know that you always hear because you are my sovereign God, but right now I am desperate for you to hear my plea. This pregnancy feels tough. I feel weak and I need your strength. Please surround me with your grace and peace as I learn how to be more like you through this pregnancy. Please protect my little baby that you are forming in my womb.
A Little More About Lelia
Leila Tualla is a Filipino-American memoirist, poet, and Christian author. Leila’s books include a YA Christian contemporary romance called, Love, Defined and a memoir/poetry collection called Storm of Hope: God, Preeclampsia, Depression and me. Her poetry is featured in a few mental health anthologies, including, Please Hear what I’m Not Saying, and We are Not Alone: stories of mental health awareness. Find more of her content at: