Are you preparing for another baby? As a mom of almost five, I thought I’d share how I’m preparing for having a fifth baby and how it differs from any other pregnancy.
When I first saw that positive pregnancy test, I felt a mix of emotions—joy, excitement, and a little bit of fear. Baby number five! Our family life was about to shift once again, and I knew this pregnancy would bring new challenges and blessings.
Actually let’s pause. The scene when I found out I was pregnant with my fifth was a little bit more dramatic. I found out I was pregnant 4 months postpartum in my work bathroom and then had a complete meltdown walking around the building, which happened to also be a current construction zone and I’m pretty sure the construction workers heard more than they should have. Kudos to them for not walking into the church office and letting someone know that there was a crazy lady having a meltdown in the church sanctuary.
Meanwhile, my husband was on the receiving end of the meltdown and he had to sit down at work in shock and his boss asked him what was going on and Dan replied, “I got my wife pregnant again.” And the boss said, “Didn’t you guys just have a baby.” To which Dan replied, “Yes.“
I went back to our text thread thinking it might be fun to share it with all of you, only to discover, that there was nothing funny or redemptive about our text thread. There was only a wife in complete panic and a husband dumbfounded.
Having a big family is something that neither of us ever dreamed of, but we also have always felt the slight nudge to put our family in God’s hands. Which, of course, brings lots of opinions from others and leads to neverending questions. Do we have enough love to go around? What did you think was going to happen? Is this the last one? Are we making the right decision? Are we doing the right thing for our older kids? Obviously some of those are our own and some of them are from others.
The early years of parenting have taught me so much, but preparing for my fifth baby feels different. With my first child, I wanted everything to be picture-perfect. Now, my focus has shifted from the aesthetics of baby gear to the heart of family dynamics. Here are three ways I’m preparing my heart and mind for this new arrival.
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Having a Fifth Baby – Three Ways I’m Preparing
Don’t get me wrong, I’m very excited about having another baby boy (yes, our fifth boy!). The shock however 4 months postpartum did take a toll on my mind. Mainly because our fourth pregnancy with baby Waylin was probably my hardest pregnancy.
2023 and 2024 were a living nightmare for me and as often happens, challenging things come in ‘threes’ and that is exactly what happened. Three distinct situations happened that left me helpless, alone, and fighting for my family in ways I couldn’t have ever imagined. The effects of those personal traumas, if you can call it that, really affected my pregnancy and postpartum period. I will forever believe that the lack of bonding that I’ve experienced with Waylin and my inability to nurse him is somehow connected to the stress of our pregnancy.
Since my last pregnancy, delivery, baby, and postpartum period are very fresh in my memory, much of that time has shaped how I’ve prepared and focused for this fifth baby. I’ve prayed many times that God would redeem this pregnancy and that God would give me a faith-based birth instead of a fear-based birth!
1. Allowing Myself Grace
With my first baby, I obsessed over every tiny detail—matching nursery sets, the perfect stroller, and every baby book recommendation from social media. Now? Let’s just say I’m over that phase. My nursery does not have to be Pinterest-perfect. Instead, I’m more focused on how to fit everyone comfortably into our home and maintain a close family bond.
Having a larger family means being flexible. We don’t have endless space, but we have enough love to go around. Complete strangers often give me their unsolicited opinions about our family size at the grocery store—some with admiration, others with judgment. But I’ve learned that big families function best when we focus on relationships rather than material things.
A few practical ways that I’ve allowed myself grace is like I’ve already mentioned in my nursery. I’m not going to have a picture-perfect nursery this time around and that’s okay. I’m focusing on practicality instead of aesthetics. I managed to get my hands on two smaller dressers that were black. They needed to be tall and/or thin and I searched high and low until I found two that fit within our budget.
I contemplated painting them to match the other white furniture, but in the end, I just didn’t have the energy to and black and white still do match!
No matter what pregnancy you are in, give yourself grace in many things, and remember that God’s grace is sufficient for you.
A scripture that encourages me:
But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.‘
2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV
This pregnancy, I’m giving myself grace, embracing the chaos, and remembering that a home filled with love is far more important than a perfectly styled space.
2. Staying Active and Nourishing My Body
Pregnancy takes a toll, especially when you already have a lot of kids to chase after! I’ve always been active and attempted exercise each pregnancy, but this time around I’m being a bit more intense about it.
My routine is early in the morning, I do 2 miles of cardio, which is usually on an elliptical or treadmill. I love running, although I’m super slow at it. Then I take time to do weights and squats. The total time is about 20-30 minutes. At first, I was doing this 5 times a week, but in my third trimester with a history of back issues, I’ve reduced it to 4 times a week. Honestly, it’s revolutionized my mental health and I can’t imagine not getting it in.
Quick note – Episode 32 of the Pain-Free Birth Podcast is very educational about impactful movement and mobility
I’ve course, I’m also focusing on homemade meals and nourishing my body with healthy protein, fats, and carbs. In the accompanying YouTube video that is linked above, I’m making sourdough crust shepherd’s pie, brown bread, and other from-scratch recipes.
I know some people really like making meals ahead of time for pregnancy and delivery. I’ve tried that a couple of pregnancies and it just doesn’t work well. Instead during pregnancy and that postpartum period I like to repurpose meals. For example, this past week I made chili one night and then the next night we had a baked potato bar with the leftover chili. Then I made mashed potatoes and pork chops and the next day we turned the leftover mashed potatoes into a shepherd’s pie.
I’m also prepping my body in other ways:
- Christian Hypnobirthing – A calming, Christ-centered approach to labor. For the courses, get 20% off using my code RACHAEL9883
- Labor prep formula – My first two births were very long – my last two have been about 6 hours and I attribute it partially to this formula.
- Staying hydrated – Water, electrolytes, and herbal teas.
- Listening to my midwife – Trusting her wisdom and experience.
- Reading “Redeeming Childbirth” – A faith-filled perspective on birth.
- Reading my Fruit of the Spirit affirmation cards – These have been a grounding force in my mindset with ALL five of my pregnancies.
- Watching positive birth experiences -I know this sounds weird at first, but it’s very powerful! This one is in particular quite amazing.
A scripture that encourages me:
“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV
Want to read more about my Fruit of the Spirit birth affirmation cards? Here is the blog post and the direct link for downloading the free cards!
This preparation isn’t just about physical health—it’s about stewarding my body well so I can serve my family with energy and joy.
3. Spending Quality Time with My Family
One of the hardest parts of a growing family is making sure each child feels seen and loved. My older children are getting used to the idea of a new sibling, but I know that once the baby comes, time will be stretched even thinner. That’s why I’m being intentional about spending quality time with my four boys before this big transition.
We’re finishing up homeschooling early again this year, which is what we did before the birth of Waylin. The goal is to have the bulk of our homeschool year finished by early April.
I’m also spending a lot of time preparing for next year’s school year. It’s probably not totally necessary, but I’m trying to get the bulk of our Unit Studies chosen for my own peace of mind.
My boys and husband are my best friends right now (and I’m sure that’s a controversial statement and I know that it’s just a season – not the husband part!), and I want them to remember this season with fondness rather than feeling like they have less time with me.
A lot of people assume bigger families mean less time for each child, but I’ve found the opposite to be true. When you prioritize connection, family size doesn’t dictate closeness.
A Scripture that encourages me:
“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.” – Psalm 127:3
Psalm 127:3 ESV
This season of life is fleeting, and I don’t want to rush through it. They will grow up before I know it, and these are the moments I’ll never get back.
Every single time we announce a new baby, we get a mix of reactions. Some people are excited, others say, “Good luck!” in a way that makes it clear they think we’re a little crazy. Then there are the classic questions about birth control, family size, and how we manage it all. I’ve been absolutely blown away by all the questions people have asked me about birth control this time around!
Yes, having a fifth child means more logistical challenges. Yes, it means adjusting our family dynamics. But it also means more love, more laughter, and more of God’s blessings. I wouldn’t trade this journey for anything.
The Good News: God’s Got This
I don’t have to have it all figured out. The best thing I can do is trust in God’s plan and lean into His grace. I may not have as much time to prepare in the same way I did for my first baby, second baby, or even my fourth baby, but I know this: God has called me to this, and He will equip me.
A scripture that encourages me:
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV
As our due date approaches, I am holding on to the promise that every child is a gift, and every stage of family life is precious.
To all the new moms, big family moms, and those wondering if they’re making the right decision—take heart. God has given you this calling for a good reason, and He will walk with you every step of the way.
So, here’s to the adventure of a 5th baby, the blessings of large families, and the joy of embracing the unknown. Let’s do this, mamas!
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Common Questions About My Natural Childbirth
These are common questions about my natural childbirth experiences. These simply are my experiences, not medical advice.
- Do you give birth without an epidural?
My first baby I received an epidural. It was the right decision without a doubt for that pregnancy. Our firstborn was 10 pounds 4 ounces and it was a 37-hour labor. None of my other pregnancies and deliveries were done with an epidural. I have found that my recovery is very different without an epidural and I’ve noticed a large difference in how alert and attentive to breastfeeding my babies are without an epidural. These are my experiences.
- How many hospital and birth center deliveries have you had?
Our first two were born in a hospital and our last two were born at a birth center.
- How is a midwife induction different than a hospital induction?
I’ve never had a hospital induction, but I have been ‘midwife’ induced twice now. I use the midwife’s brew, which I’ve learned is controversial. I personally don’t have a problem with it. The castor oil helps mimic contractions, which will signal your body to go into labor. It’s worked for me very well.
- Do you take any sort of birth course?
I’ve always recommended the book Redeeming Childbirth by Angie Toplin. I read it my first pregnancy and I have read it many times throughout my five pregnancies. This time I was offered a birth course by Christian Hypnobirthing and it is truly fantastic. I would highly recommend it for any pregnancy! I also have been very blessed by the app with the verbal tracks! Use code RACHAEL9883 for 20% off!
- How long have your labors been?
Baby 1 – 37 hours
Baby 2- 24 hours
Baby 3 – Around 6 hours
Baby 4 – Around 6 hours
- Do you do waterbirths?
I have labored in the water, but I do not give birth in the water. Mostly because it has never felt quite right for me and I have found myself more nauseated in the water (I’ve even thrown up, which I’m not a fan of!).
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