Sometimes when I sit still long enough, I wonder about the depth and despair that Mary felt as she watched her son die a cruel and painful death. I wonder what the Bible says about loss. Where are the comforting Bible verses for loss? Because to me, sometimes the Bible seems filled with sadness.
My heart breaks for so many reasons. It breaks out of my great love and deep appreciation for what Jesus did for me. It breaks out of my love as a mother, for my children.
You see, I too have experienced the loss of a child. And the only word that I can find to explain it is “heartbreaking.”
Now, let me tell you… I am so very blessed to have 6 amazing children, ages ranging from 18 all the way down to 5! I thank God every day for them. They are my pride and joy!
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Bible Verses for Grief
Even with that joy, when I stop and reflect on being a mother, my eyes fill with tears and my heart stops a beat.
You see friends, amid giving birth to 6 kids, I have had to bury 3 more children.
Jordan. Avalyn. Emiliana.
All 3 losses were tragic and still bring me such sadness, even today. But one loss specifically changed my life forever.
It all started Christmas Eve, 5 years ago. I was hurrying around preparing for company coming to celebrate the birth of Jesus. What a joyous night! The house was clean, the kids were behaving, and dinner was almost done. I was feeling pretty good, despite being so busy.
As I was putting the final touches on dinner and waiting for family to arrive, I walked through the kitchen only to be stopped with an unbearable sharp pain, swiftly followed by a gush of blood spilling everywhere onto the floor.
I rushed to the bathroom upstairs, having no idea what was happening. After a few minutes up there, the pain became excruciating. I laid on the bathroom floor, crying and screaming in horrible pain while I called out to my husband.
At that moment, I knew my body was setting things in motion to deliver my ninth sweet baby, Emiliana. A little one I’d never get to hear cry or watch grow into a beautiful, young woman.
On Christmas Eve 2014, a night we joyously prepared to celebrate the birth of Our Lord… I was giving birth to my last child, one I would never know.
A Comforting Bible Verse for Loss
Scripture tells us in Psalms 34:18 (NIV):
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”Psalm 34:18 NIV
But if I am being honest, I didn’t feel God’s closeness that night nor in the months to come. I spent countless nights crying with my husband, mourning the loss of our child. God felt so distant in my pain day after day, as I cried out at Him, “Why?”
Yet this comforting Bible verse for loss tells us that God is close to us when we feel more brokenhearted than ever before. This Bible verse is from the Psalms, if you are looking for hope in the scriptures, the Psalms is a excellent place to start. Some of the most grievous passages in scriptures can be found in the Psalms.
Searching for Healing After Loss
The doctors said it would take a few weeks for my body to begin to heal and recover, because as mothers and women… that is what our bodies do naturally. But my body mourned for much longer. I bled and hemorrhaged for 18 months. And my heart bled during that time as well.
Thinking back, I have so much empathy for the woman that Scripture talks about in Matthew 9. Do you remember her story? Jesus had just brought a synagogue leader’s daughter back to life and as He continued on His way, He and the disciples came upon a woman who was very sick. And she had been bleeding for quite some time. Scripture begins this very poignant story in Matthew 9:20-21 (NIV):
“Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.”Matthew 9:20-21 (NIV)
She desperately wanted healing from her disorder and knew that the only person who was able to heal her was Jesus. She probably traveled a long distance just to be within sight, hoping that He might be merciful and heal her. “If only I could get close enough, He would heal me,” she thought.
During those 18 months, I remember praying for healing and restoration of my body, thinking if only Jesus would heal me. But the healing didn’t come during that time and I began to grow weary, physically and emotionally.
I had surgery after surgery to stop the bleeding, to no avail. The doctors tried new procedures and medications, which all failed. All my children had come by c-section (those stories are crazy in and of themselves, by the way) and since I had gone through so many abdominal surgeries and other health issues, no doctor would even consider a hysterectomy to stop the bleeding.
The best hope was that I would go into early menopause and some of the shots they were giving me would slow down the hemorrhaging enough that I wouldn’t bleed to death.
During that time, we found out I also had developed a uterine tumor. This tumor was thought to be benign and was attached in a place that surgery would also prove dangerous. I was advised to wait this out as well and given medication that would hopefully shrink the tumor and help with the bleeding.
By the way, did I tell you I was only 39? Menopause, really? I could be suffering like this for 10-20 years.
Hope and Confidence
Fast forward to last year. I went in for a routine annual exam with my family doctor and she was concerned about the increase in abdominal pain and bleeding I was experiencing. She immediately sent me for imaging, and tests revealed that the tumor had tripled in size in the past year. She referred me to a specialist, in hopes that this doctor would have some other treatment ideas.
And ideas she had.
After carefully reviewing ALL my medical history and imaging, she said to me, “We need to remove this tumor and the only way to do so is by hysterectomy. I have no question that this is what needs to happen, and it needs to happen right away. I am not worried at all about the surgery. I have full confidence that it will go well.”
What was I hearing? A doctor who was not afraid of this procedure?
He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.Psalm 91:4 NIV
Once again, God was showing me that he was my comfort and refuge. In His sovereignty and His timing, he would provide.
Peaceful Bible Verses about Loss
I prayed and prayed about whether this was the right thing to do. God answered my prayer very distinctly, putting complete peace in my heart. You see friends, when we lay our burdens at the feet of Jesus, at the cross… placing our hope and trust in Him, Scripture promises that He will bring peace and understanding in all circumstances. We read in Philippians 4:7 (NIV) that:
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”Philippians 4:7 (NIV)
The peace that washed over me was not my own. It was a supernatural peace that I could not have conjured up even if I had tried.
And as I reflect on the events that happened after that peace washed over me, I know that God was bringing restoration and healing. It didn’t look like what I had envisioned. God didn’t miraculously stop the bleeding, leaving me to have more children. He didn’t bring about a new medication that the doctors had yet to try. But what He did do was show up in beautiful and tangible ways each and every day. Carrying me, sustaining me and giving me peace and strength. He brought a new doctor into my life who was covered in His wisdom and confidence, one that would successfully perform a hysterectomy against all odds.
Restoration and Redemption after Loss
God brought restoration to my heart and my body. He fully redeemed the loss of my last child Emiliana. My heart sings with joy, knowing I was able to carry her for the time that God had predetermined, writing it in the stars. Knowing now that she looks down on my family from Heaven.
During that whole ordeal, I learned so much about God’s character… His faithfulness in our trials and His steadfast love. In the book of Lamentations, we see the “Weeping Prophet” Jeremiah pouring out his heart to God. Lamenting over Israel’s sin and his own personal suffering within that. But he was able to look past the dreadful state surrounding him and keep his eyes focused on God. Jeremiah clearly saw God’s goodness and faithfulness, and remained focused on His steadfast love throughout it all.
“Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”Lamentations 3:22-23 (NIV)
Just like God was with Jeremiah each day during the dark time for the Jewish people, God was with me after I lost Emiliana. As the sun rose each morning, He brought new strength, comfort and peace. He showered me with His love, reminded me of His faithfulness, and lavished me with His supernatural peace. He brought redemption, turning my tears into joy and filling my heart with gratitude for His presence in my life.
5 Comforting Bible Verses for Loss
The Bible is filled with Bible verses that can comfort during a time of loss. During my journey there have been 5 comforting Bible verses for loss that have been a shield of protection over my heart as I have processed and grown in Christ. You can download the pack of these phone wall paper images to use on your phone and remind you of God's comfort during loss.
- “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18 NIV
- “Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.” Matthew 9:20-21 (NIV)
- "He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart." Psalms 91:4 NIV
- “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7 NIV
- “Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23 (NIV)
A Little More About Pamela
You can find Pamela nestled in a tiny Colorado town close to the mountains, with an iced caramel coffee in one hand and a good book in the other. She proudly proclaims herself as a Jesus follower, blessed wife of 21+ years, and a momma to 6 wonderful kids! With a passion for inspiring and encouraging women to seek Jesus in their daily lives, she radiates the love and grace of God in both her writing and speaking ventures. An encourager of women, ministry leader, and advocate for the poor, her writing will bring nourishment to your soul and joy to your heart. Pamela has taken a break from blogging and speaking to focus on her health and family.